Bianca Jagoe | Illustration + Design
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Bloody

So, I've given up on True Blood. I gave it 7 episodes and it should have been good by now.

I welcome anyone who would like to help me win back any respect for it, but in essence, I found it to be overdone, over-acted and over-sexed with seemingly little underlying plot, characters neither likable, believable or evoking any empathy and overly-literal, weak dialogue. Teemed with some awful violent sex scenes, stereotypical one-dimensional characatures (sassy black waitress; gay black chef; brooding, lonely vampire; shallow, ditsy, sexed-up females) and some of the worst fake accents I've ever heard (3 of the main characters are from New Zealand, the UK and Australia, respectively, and none of the actors in the show are actually from the South, leading the way for some really unconvincing gargly Southern Accents), I had a really hard time making it through seven episodes. I wanted to see it out, finish the season, but I just had so little time for something I found to be so lacking in any depth.

It felt like a bad soap opera lined with some pop vampire lore, depicting women as weak, meek, sexual objects that need taking care of. I thought plot advancement and character development were pretty important aspects in a tv show, but turns out I was mistaken. This show takes itself really seriously. When it comes to vampires, it's a bit like, do it seriously and do it well, or ham it up and make it fun. How can the follow-up creation by somebody who made a series like Six Feet Under be so disappointing?

If anyone reading this watches this show and saw something in it that I didn't could you let me know? Have I missed something? I wanted to like it. I tried. I feel like I may be being too harsh, but I can't see anything in it. What is there to like about this show? Should I brave through those next five episodes?

It puzzles me that this show has such high ratings and such a massive viewership despite it's shortcomings. I guess as is the case of U2 ('U2 has been dubbed "The World's Biggest Band," which means the group has serious flaws. Most people are idiots, so if millions of them like your music, you're probably doing something wrong') the fact that this show is so popular doesn't necessarily mean that it's real good.

I feel that I may be being offensive with my open distaste for this show, but I am truly interested and waiting for somebody to explain to me what they liked about it. Anyone?

True Blood; 1 out of 5 stars.