^ unknown >:(
Man is the only animal for whom his own existence is a problem which he has to solve.
Isn't it sad to go to your grave without ever wondering why you were born? Who, with such a thought, would not spring from bed, eager to resume discovering the world and rejoicing to be part of it?

As soon as man does not take his existence for granted, but beholds it as something unfathomably mysterious, thought begins.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and it has been getting in the way of my doing anything lately. In all honesty I feel depressed, with great highs and lows, I have difficulty verbalising these feelings or doing anything aside from them and feel that it is inappropriate to display them in a public forum. I have decided I am just going to do things that make me feel good, and I'll keep doing those things until they don't. I suppose blogging is one of the things under consideration.

On a entirely different note... I just submitted a drawing of a giraffe to OneMillionGiraffes.com. This guy needs one million hand-drawn pictures of giraffes by 2011 so he can prove his friend wrong that collecting one million drawings of giraffes is impossible. Here is the drawing I did. I kind of screwed up the legs, so I decided he/she was an awkward ballet-dancing scarf-wearing giraffe instead ;

And here is the drawing I made C do;

I wholeheartedly encourage you to submit your own giraffe :)

Remember that site I was desperately trying to find last week? Well the lovely miss Robyn (which is also my middle name) from Robayre commented me and told me what it was! I am so so grateful and have spent the whole evening on the blog; The Scribble Project. Robyn if there is any way I can repay you let me know :)

The day before yesterday my sister and her friend Rokia came to stay and we went to the Hamilton markets and looked around for a while. I bought a letter "B" badge and um-ed and ah-ed over a red striped hugely ruffled shirt that I decided to get without trying on and which ended up being ridiculous looking and over the top. I'm deciding what to do with it at the moment and unhappily trying and retrying it on thinking I might eventually like the ridiculous ruffles.

Tonight I went for a trip to Dungog with my friends Manneh and Dan for a few hours. They had a footy game to play (all but two of their team is made up of soccer players who are learning how to play football in their soccer off-season) and I thought I'd go visit la famiglia. I got to (re)meet my little sister's boyfriend. He seems lovely and appears to endure a great deal of (good humoured) abuse and violence from my sister, though I can't say it is too much removed from the way that I lovingly treat C :P After their game the boys came to pick me up and we went to the 'top pub' and had non-alcoholic fire engines and later the power went out and there was green lightning and a whole lot of wind and we had to head home quickly before the hail hit. Driving over the hills home through the lightening was a pretty amazing show. Along the way home we stopped at a bridge where there were a lot of cars and lights and noise and the sad news that a seventeen year old boy had jumped off the bridge into the water, likely hit something on the descent and still hadn't been found. We had seen that same group of boys jumping off into the river when we drove past earlier. So sad.

I'm thinking of making the trip to Dungog with the boys every Monday afternoon when they go, hopefully without the ridiculous weather and sad accident along the way.

C wasn't expecting me home tonight as I had said I would stay at my parents, but decided to come home, and when I got in I started making myself a sandwich, then I heard him coming through the gate, so I left my sandwich on the kitchen bench and hid in the cupboard for him to open the back door. He saw the sandwich, looked puzzled and then I jumped out and scared him and he looked very frightened. I don't think I've ever scared him before, so it was very satisfying.

Here are some letters I'm sending out early this week. I feel like I'm forever behind in the letter writing stakes;